All siblings fight.
I grew up with only one brother who was ten years younger than me and we still managed to find things to argue about!
So, you can imagine in a house with five siblings, the kind of chaos that can ensue.
Although, at the end of the day, my kids really do enjoy being together and are each others best friends.
Here are some things I've learned over the years that help foster healthy sibling relationships.
1. MIRROR WHAT YOU WANT TO SEE IN YOUR CHILDREN
It really is true that kids learn more from example than having their ear talked off.
They look to their parents and other influential adults in their lives to show them healthy examples of relationships.
If you don't want your kids to yell at each other, it's probably a good idea to start softening your own tone.
Be sure to show common courtesies, like saying please and thank you.
And practice having patience, patience and more patience!
2. GIVE THEM TO TOOLS TO WORK THROUGH CONFLICT
Of course it's easy to interject every time your kids fight, but giving them opportunities to solve their own conflicts will ultimately save your own sanity!
Involve them in problem solving and finding ways to resolve the conflict so everyone wins.
In our home every offense is followed by a sincere apology with a hug and kiss. You may not be able to get away with this if you're dealing with older kids, but I find showing affection really helps dilute the situation.
3. CREATE OPPORTUNITIES FOR FRIENDSHIP
We get so consumed with daily tasks, appointments and extra curricular activities, it's hard to find any free time.
I'm all for getting kids involved in team sports and organized groups, but I'm also about letting kids make their own fun.
Just try letting your kids occupy themselves for an hour and you'll be amazed what they can come up with for fun. I'm talking about no T.V, computer or video games. Just let them be together and see what happens.
We don't have many playdates going on at our house. Of course we do have friends over from time to time, but kids see their friends at school for up to eight hours a day!
The only way to help build a close relationship with their siblings is to allow them time together, just them.
Create opportunities fro them to play with each other on a daily basis.
4. A LITTLE TRICKERY WILL GO A LONG WAY
O.K, that sounds a bit sneaky, but sometimes you have to pull out all the stops!
Be intentional in the toys and activities you have around the house that will encourage the kids to play spend time together.
Board games are always fantastic since they need anywhere from 2-6 players. Also have decks of cards for impromptu games of Go Fish and War.
Other great items to have on hand include, playdough, Lego (lot's and lot's of Lego!), pretend playsets for little ones, like a kitchen or playhouse.
If you have the space and money, the best investment we ever made was getting a trampoline for the backyard! My kids have collectively spent hours upon hours jumping around in that thing.
The laughter I hear is priceless.
There may also be a few bumped heads from time to time, but everything comes with a small price!
